Working on my Wesite

Good afternoon all,
I have put my dolls aside while I work on my website and tending to my husband. Both my husband & my website are slow going. If you should go to my website (http://www.tatteredcowwings.com ) at this time Please excuse my mess as I'm still trying to unwrap everything.

I had someone ask me why the color pink on my website? Well as most of you know it's for Breast Cancer Awareness.. As I have said before, if you seen pink in anything that I do it's for Breast Cancer Awareness.

You might want to get you some tissue for the true story below, or leave now.

I remember when my Ex Mother in law (Oma Nell) couldn't find a gift to give her sister for her birthday,( back the in early 90's) so she gave her a Mammogram.. I thought to myself what a silly gift and there is no better gift any better than a mammogram. Truly a Gift of love.

In the gift of the mammogram, her sister returned the gift by giving her mammogram.. Oma Nell sister found out a week later after having the mammogram that she had breast cancer. She fought a good fight, she got tough and lived only a year and a half..Oma always said it was her fault her sister died, but it wasn't.. Her sister lived 1 1/2 longer than she would have without treatments..

Then after Oma Nells sister died, Oma would have her mammograms done twice a year. Nothing would ever show up, always free and clear of cancer until one day. Oma Nell found out she had breast cancer. I never will forget that day. Oma, said in her words "cut it off" I don't need it to live and I want to live.

I was there the day the cancer was taking and there after it was over. I drove her to the Doctor's with her drain tubes,and all the while she was smiling.. I seen her go through chemotherapy and loose her hair, all the while smiling, just happy to be living..

And live she did, 6 years later she ended up with breast cancer in her other breast. Again she said the same words,"cut it off", I don't need it to live and I want to live.

In the middle of 2005 I found out that the chemotherapy wasn't working and that she only had a few months to live. I couldn't even talk to her without crying. I couldn't look at her without crying, all the while she was smiling, just happy to be alive. Boy was that tough!

Then I got the call from my daughter and said Mom come quick to the hospital, Grandma is dying " the doctors said it could be any time. She knew she was dying the doctors had told her time and time again.

She told her husband to call the Pastor because she wanted to make sure her heart was right with God before she passed away. She made all of her burial plans from the hospital room with the pastor and husband there.

I got there as soon as I could.. I went to my Mother in laws bedside. She was awake and you guess it "smiling". Oma said, Hello Love and my tears just fell. I told her "you knew I would be here" and she "Yes, Love... I knew".

Then she was talking about old times and what she would miss the most about living. She just kept saying how much she loved everyone and how she wanted all of us to know that.

Then out of the blue she said she could eat something after all she hadn't ate anything for right at two weeks. She said she wanted bacon and eggs with white bread. I raced to Denny's and thought I have to hurry. It seeemed like the car wasn't moving fast enough. All I could think about while I was gone to get her food was I hope she is alive when I get back.

Thank God she was! She ate all her food. We all laughed and everyone said she was doing so much better with me there. The doctor said she could live at least another 2 to 4 weeks but then again it was hard to give a time, that was Gods Job.
So I kissed her on the cheek and told her I would be back soon. I told her to remember I Love you. She said "I Love you too Love" and when are you coming home? We all need you. I told her soon, I hope soon..

I left that night and hoped that the Doctors were wrong. I cried all the way for my three hour trip home. My children, ex father in Law, and ex husband, were a mess as well as myself.

A week had passed and the weekend was just a day away. I had planned to go and see her on the weekend and stay with her. But I didn't get the chance.
My daughter called me crying and I knew it was over. I don't think any words were said the crying said it all. My Mother in law died of breast cancer in 2005. She was laid to rest on Halloween day.

I'll always be in the pink and keep Oma in my heart.